Crawling out from under my bed … with a little help from my kids

By Mary Kay Roth

My son, Josh, works in a high-poverty school district in Kansas City where a dedicated group of educators have long dreamed of opening a brand-new high school.  Friday, they broke ground on that new school, blessed the land and tucked their dreams into a time vault that will be buried on the site.

I was blessed to be there – through the speeches, the pride, the tears.  And I was struck with what they did not talk about that day.  They did not speak about the gloomy world right now, nor of feeling hopeless, helpless or disheartened.  Instead, they spoke with fire and faith about the children they have served – and about the children who are waiting for the new school doors to open.

They talked of embracing challenges – not kneeling to challenges. They spoke of making a difference in this rough and tough world … of making a difference, one child at a time.

Personally, I needed that groundbreaking. I needed to be reminded of what we can accomplish right now – not what we cannot.  I needed to remember the power of simply showing up and standing up. 

The American Psychological Association reports more than 80 percent of Americans are feeling stressed and uneasy amidst a collective trauma of pandemic fatigue, unexpected war, a vicious political landscape.  In fact, almost everyone around me says they feel powerless right now, ready to howl and rage at the moon. 

I’ve never had any certainty about how the concept of good and evil plays out in our lives.  But if there are indeed forces of evil, I am absolutely sure they would relish the sense that people are feeling useless, exhausted and apathetic.

And yet  … I know a woman who gathered with friends outside a mosque in Omaha last month to hand out candy to those leaving the final worship service for their holy month – wishing everyone Blessed Eid.

And yet … each year, a friend of mine collects and delivers clothes for women who need a second chance – another friend is part of a support system for a freshly-arrived Afghan family – and yet another friend has taken a leap of faith to join a local political campaign.

In a recent conversation with Dan Lambe, the new leader of the Arbor Day Foundation, he acknowledged frustration about ongoing climate change.  But what you can do, he said with conviction, is to continue fighting the good fight.  And plant trees … one tree at a time.

There’s a five-minute speech from Michigan State Sen. Mallory McMorrow – that has gone viral – as she ardently defends herself against a completely unfounded allegation: "I know that hate will only win if people like me stand by and let it happen … I know who I am. I know what faith and service means, and what it calls for in this moment. We will not let hate win." 

It’s not an accident McMorrow has become a national sensation, because I think she reminds us of something we all know, deep down: This is exactly the wrong time to throw in the towel, fold the cards, surrender.

The Nebraska governor’s campaign, for instance, seems to be a Republican race to the lowest common denominator – with a bull-semen baron and serial groper … alongside a guy who totes a fierce gun. But we are not helpless here, folks.  The primary election is Tuesday:  Go to the polls and vote.  

One tree at a time.  One child at a time.  It’s a tough gig to do good works in this world right now – when I mostly want to crawl underneath my bed.  

Witnessing horrific scenes from Ukraine, I may not be able to take out Vladimir Putin, but I can welcome and support new immigrants to our community and perhaps someday, new Ukrainians.

I cannot single-handedly stop global warming, but I can rise up and protest a proposal to take away more green space from our beloved Woods Park (Woods Park: Keep it Green). 

Yes, I felt helpless watching potential prison reform dissolve into absurd debate in the Nebraska Legislature this past session, but my daughter Anna keeps showing up for work, every day, a nurse practitioner helping inmates deal with mental health issues.

And though I grieve the fate of our landmark Roe v. Wade decision, I can continue escorting women who come to Planned Parenthood and are bullied and harassed. 

The glorious young poet, Amanda Gorman, wrote something for New Year’s 2022 called, “New Day’s Lyric,” in which she shared these words:

“May this be the day
We come together…

Hope is our door, our portal.”

Today is Mother’s Day, and perhaps motherhood – fatherhood, grandparenthood, guardianship – is one of the most courageous, hopeful portals you can go through in life …. having the audacity to believe you can create good humans.  Every single day, the two humans I helped raise – Josh and Anna – inspire me to crawl out from underneath my bed and remember: We make a difference by showing up, standing up and never losing faith.

At Friday’s high school groundbreaking ceremony, my son explained the item he had chosen to put inside the time vault: a photograph of his foster grandson, Legacy.  In the end, he said, the new high school does not belong to educators – it belongs to students who will find a future there. 

One child at a time.

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The full text of Amanda Gorman’s “New Day’s Lyric”

May this be the day
We come together.
Mourning, we come to mend,
Withered, we come to weather,
Torn, we come to tend,
Battered, we come to better.
Tethered by this year of yearning,
We are learning
That though we weren't ready for this,
We have been readied by it.
We steadily vow that no matter
How we are weighed down,
We must always pave a way forward.

This hope is our door, our portal.
Even if we never get back to normal,
Someday we can venture beyond it,
To leave the known and take the first steps.
So let us not return to what was normal,
But reach toward what is next.

What was cursed, we will cure.
What was plagued, we will prove pure.
Where we tend to argue, we will try to agree,
Those fortunes we forswore, now the future we foresee,
Where we weren't aware, we're now awake;
Those moments we missed
Are now these moments we make,
The moments we meet,
And our hearts, once altogether beaten,
Now all together beat.

Come, look up with kindness yet,
For even solace can be sourced from sorrow.
We remember, not just for the sake of yesterday,
But to take on tomorrow.

We heed this old spirit,
In a new day's lyric,
In our hearts, we hear it:
For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne.
Be bold, sang Time this year,
Be bold, sang Time,
For when you honor yesterday,
Tomorrow ye will find.
Know what we've fought
Need not be forgot nor for none.
It defines us, binds us as one,
Come over, join this day just begun.
For wherever we come together,
We will forever overcome.